The phone rings…
I am too cozy inside my rug to get up and attend the call. I stretch out for my life saver of the hour – my pillow. Pulling it up over my head, I manage to subdue the noise…
Zzzzzzz…….
Beep Beep… Beep Beep…
Now it’s the turn of the notorious alarm clock. Even the pillow over my head fails to drown the shrilling blare. I have to give up.
Pulling myself out of the rug, I somehow manage to shut the darn thing off, but by then the phone starts ringing again.
“Good morning sir… this is your wake up call for 9 AM. We have been trying to wake you up since an hour now. Have a great day!”
Gosh! It is already quarter past 10… Sam and Jose would kill me.
No they won’t kill me, they aren’t that bad. But I am sure they are in the middle of their breakfast at this moment and by the time I reach, the breakfast service would have ended!! Now that is even worse than getting killed by Sam and Jose!
I quickly enter the toilet… Sitting there I start contemplating about ways in which I could at the least grab an omelet from the restaurant. Brushing my teeth and shaving are two tasks which I could do without at this critical situation. That leaves me with just one task – getting dressed!
* * *
This is where I will eclipse my toilet exploits for a while and throw some light on some more important information. If you are wondering, where I am at this moment, I am in a hotel at a country in Middle East with my team for business.
“Business” – That is what we “sales folks” term anything and everything that we do at work. We travel for “business” trips, attend “business” meetings. Even our visas are known as “business” visas and sometimes if we get lucky, we even travel “business” class. So now that I have explained the importance of this word in our lives, I will continue with my story. After a long and hectic conference in the country, today was Friday – the weekend of the Middle East. From tomorrow we begin our series of “business” meetings.
It is very rare for us to get some time for ourselves during our business trip, so Sam and Jose had left no stone unturned to make this day as eventful as possible. That explains the 10:30 AM deadline, when we are to set out of the hotel for the biggest shopping center in the city.
The agenda? Shopping, movies and eating out.
Eating out… phew!! If ever I am travelling to a foreign country with Sam, it is always turns out to be a herculean task to get food at the right time. Sam’s fervor for Indian food always results in us roaming endlessly in unchartered territories. However, the end result always makes it up for the effort put in, as I too am not too fond of cold sandwiches and near-raw meat that are usually served at most places abroad.
* * *
Now back to my toilet saga…
I look down… the shorts that I am wearing seem good enough for the outing that we have planned for today. Looking further down I conclude that the sandals aren’t bad either. All I need to do now is wash, flush and rush – which I finish off in no time. On my way out I quickly grab my green t-shirt, and try to slither it over my head – and this is when my left foot gets caught in the carpet and I come crashing down – BANG!!
“Little do I realize at this time that this is the supernatural power in action, which is trying to give me a not-so subtle hint about something being absolutely not right.”
I rise unperturbed and rush to the restaurant.
* * *
It is already 10:25 AM when I reach the restaurant. The welcome board yells out at me, “Breakfast: 6:30 AM to 10:30 AM”. I mock at the board and rush to the omelet counter.
As I am about to place my order, a voice booms out from over my shoulder, “four egg whites, with salt onion and pepper… and yes, cooked well from both sides”. Hey that’s exactly what I want. I turn back to see Jose smiling at me. “Sir, this order is already set for you at the table…” saying this he points towards Sam, who is waving at me from the corner table.
“Good morning Aadi”, says Sam as I pull up my chair at the table. I could see that Jose had already finished his continental breakfast and was just left with some coffee. Sam cleans his plate by taking the last bite of his French toast.
“You can do a huge favor on us by just managing with this omelet today bro…” Sam tells me. Although he puts it as a request to me but I know Sam means business. “The least you could have done is shaved before coming down for breakfast…” Sam’s mocking continues.
* * *
Till the time I think of giving back a good answer to Sam, let me give you his brief introduction. Sam, the sales head of our group, is the boss of Jose and me. Sales is his life and in every part of his life.
His goal? - To make every member of his team the best sales person in this world.
Since the last one year, ever since he has hired me, Sam has been on his toes to make me presentable as a valuable member of the ‘Sales fraternity’; however some nuts like me are difficult to crack. Although in my defense I can say that I have modified myself a lot – from being the torn-jeans-n-slippers lad from the city, I have now become a so-called high-flying executive who wears suits for most of his day-time activities and shirts with cufflinks for his sun-down engagements. I have even sacrificed my long tresses for this job and my ambition to get a tattoo on my right arm seems like a distant dream now.
However, underneath this strict and no-nonsense shell of Sam lies a caring elder brother who makes sure that even the roughest weathers pass through him before touching his team.
* * *
“Come on Sam… it is the weekend today,” I say. “And moreover, I had shaved last night only…” I add.
“Then you better do something about your hyper-active hormones Aadi, that cause your facial hair to grow back so fast,” Sam strikes back.
I am stubborn, but I am not stupid. I know when to shut up during an argument – especially when there seems to be no chance of the decision going in my favor. I silently set out to finish my breakfast – if you can call that a breakfast.
* * *
“I have called the taxi and it is waiting for us outside the hotel,” Jose declares with a glance at his watch. That is typical Jose… always so particular and so perfect. Now that I have mentioned about this guy and since I have some time till we walk up to the taxi, let me take this opportunity to introduce my counterpart, Jose.
Jose is the perfect example of the good boy that we used to have as class-monitors in our schools.
He always wakes up in time in the morning, finishes all his tasks on time, shaves impeccably every day! And his clothes… his clothes are always formal… yes ALWAYS. Even on a weekend, Jose dresses up in a crisp ironed shirt and a pleated trouser. I sometimes wonder if this guy ever gets into his pajamas, or does he sleep in his business suit?
* * *
As we step out in the smoldering heat of the Middle East summers, Jose spots our taxi and runs towards it. This is when Sam slips something into my pocket and walks off. I dig into my pocket to extract a handful of dry fruits and nuts. I shout out to Sam, “Thanks for that…”
He winks at me and says, “I know that omelet won’t be able to sustain you for more than an hour dude… keep munching till I treat you guys to a grand Indian lunch today!” Popping an almond into my mouth, I follow him to the taxi.
“To the City Center,” Jose directs the driver. Each of us gets busy immediately in directing the AC vent towards our faces. Phew! This heat could roast a duck live on the streets…
“Where are you from?” the driver tries to strike a conversation.
“India,” Jose replies.
“Me from Pakistan,” the driver answers an unasked question.
In no time the conversation between the driver and Jose moves on from countries to Indian movies and Indian film stars. Sam chooses to be the silent spectator, while I wonder about the fact that how could the people from Pakistan who we meet abroad be so friendly with us and vice versa. If only our political leaders could take a few tips from us…
Pondering over this thought, I set out on my mission to hog down the dry-fruits given to me by Sam, before anybody else gets into the mood of munching on a few themselves. In no time we reach our destination and incidentally I too finish my extended breakfast.
* * *
As soon as we enter the mall, we look for directions towards the Carrefour. That’s our global favorite supermarket and on it we rely for our small ration of soft drinks and snacks for our stay during the business trips.
After entering Carrefour, Jose asks me to pick up some cold drink for him and strays away to the books section. Sam and I pick up a cart and begin our shopping expedition. An interesting thing to be pointed out at this moment is that both Sam and I are born shopaholics, and when it comes to this activity we can even put the female of our species to shame. After picking up the regular wafers, biscuits, juices, cold drinks and some chewing gum, we move towards the toys section.
“Why don’t you spend time at a section of your choice, while I pick up some toys for my daughter,” says Sam he adds.
I like the idea as I have pretty much no interest in the toys section.
“Okay then… Catch up with me at the electronics section,” saying this I move on.
* * *
I start looking for directions to the electronics section. That is when I notice a guy staring at my t-shirt with awe. By his attire I can make out that he is a resident of this country. I smile at him and move on…
As I pass by the clothes section, I walk past a mirror. Taking a few steps back I look at myself on the mirror and check if there is something on my t-shirt to attract attention. No… there isn’t.
My gaze travels to the background in the mirror… Oh my God! I see the same guy approaching me from a distance. I start contemplating what might the guy’s intentions be!
“Oh ok… now I understand things a bit clearly,” I explain to myself.
“After ages I have been working out in the gym during this long stay at the hotel. This short stint at the gym might have chiseled out my muscular body from my college body-building days…” I assume. “Moreover, this body-hugging t-shirt fails to be as modest as I am about my well puffed biceps…”
And I have read a lot about homosexuality being openly accepted in countries outside India. With this instance, things start falling into place. However, since my preferences are totally different from this guy’s, this situation calls for an SOS. I take bigger steps towards the electronics section now. On the way I pick up the cold drinks for Jose.
I am sure that the guy must have given up by now. Dropping the cold-drink cans in a cart, I push it towards the sign displaying “Computer Peripherals”.
There is a Sony external hard disk which I have been eyeing since a long while… let me find out if I can afford it with my savings this time.
Little did I know that I had heaved my sigh of relief a little too soon.
“Excuse me Mister!!” a voice booms from behind my back. I turn around and to my horror see the same guy approaching me. This fellow seems to be really desperate to get me.
I ignore his callout and rush towards the toy section. There I see Sam and Jose from a distance and rush to them in no time. Phew… now I am not alone.
“Hey Mister… I think you not hear me! I asking you to stop for so long!” the guy steps in right between me and my colleagues.
* * *
I tell myself, “it is all right Aadi… this man wouldn’t molest you in a public place.” I try all means to pacify myself. I can talk it out and explain to this guy that although I respect his thoughts and inclinations but I wouldn’t be interested in him.
“What’s wrong?” Sam comes out from behind this man. Jose is with him.
“Is he your friend?” the guy asks Sam pointing his finger at me.
“Yes, he is… why do you ask?” Sam retorts.
“Mister… your friend needs to take off his t-shirt RIGHT NOW… else I call the police!” the guy replies.
My jaw drops. I was 100% correct about this guy’s intentions. By now I start believing more in my super powers to judge people – just by looking at a person I can grasp what he is thinking about in no time. However, what bugs me at this situation is how can this guy threaten me so openly?!?
“And may I ask why?” Sam enquires.
“Because in our country alcohol is UNACCEPTABLE… and your friend is wearing a Heineken t-shirt,” he snaps back.
* * *
“What!” Sam, Jose and I gasp in unison.
“Buddy… my friend here is just wearing a Heineken t-shirt… he’s not drinking in public,” Jose tries to play the role of my advocate. Sam nods in agreement.
“I say take off t-shirt or I call police…” the guy adamantly stands by his words.
Finding my friends beside me, I too gather some courage.
“Yes Mister, I am not taking off this t-shirt… do whatever you want to do!” I find my lost voice.
“Oh is it? You are in deep trouble mister… deep trouble!” saying this he walks off.
I feel that I have scared away the idiot. My confidence melts down in no time when Jose whispers to me, “Aadi, I hope we haven’t taken a wrong step by messing around like this in an unknown territory!”
I try to shrug of my fear by saying, “No way Jose… what on earth can that guy do to us?” As soon as I complete my statement, I see the guy returning with two sturdy police men by his sides.
That is enough for my bravery… I look around, spot the nearest sign to the toilet, and flee from the ‘scene of crime’ in a jiffy. I did not see behind me but am sure that close on my heels are Sam and Jose.
* * *
Crashing into the toilet I heave a sigh of relief. Having taken such a twisted and turned path, I am sure that the two overweight policemen and the guy could never have chased me.
I look at my t-shirt in the mirror. Sam and Jose too stare from behind me.
“Take off the darn t-shirt”, Sam says. “You can be in your vest,” he adds.
“If only I would have worn a vest today!” I think out aloud.
“What!” Sam and Jose cry in chorus now. We all are getting better in this skill of exclaiming in accord.
Sam stares at me in fury. I am sure that if the local law doesn’t prosecute me for WEARING the Heineken t-shirt, Sam would certainly hang me for NOT WEARING a vest. In the sales-grooming lessons of Sam, “ALWAYS wear a vest!” was lesson number two – which came a close second after “Shave EVERYDAY!”
In sheer anxiety, I quickly take off my t-shirt. As I shed the piece of cloth from my body, a wee bit of smile curves up in Jose’s face.
“Eureka!” he screams.
I look at Jose in bewilderment. Sam reciprocates my feelings.
“Aadi… I have got an idea!” Jose shouts out in joy. “Just wear your t-shirt like it is now – inside out!” Jose explains.
I look down at my t-shirt. It has turned inside out while I was taking it off – and now it is nothing but a plain gray t-shirt. Without second thoughts I wear my inside out t-shirt and we catch the first taxi back to our hotel.
* * *
The journey back to the hotel is pretty uneventful with none of us uttering a single word throughout the entire drive. I presume that like me the other two are also just praying to their respective gods for saving our asses today.
We enter the hotel and after a brief adieu, head out to our respective rooms. I fish out my room key and swipe it to open the door to my room. All I need right now is a cool shower to loosen me up.
As I step into my room, I spot a white envelop lying at the entrance. I open it to find an invitation card:
--------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Sir,
As an esteemed club-member of our hotel, we would like to extend to you an invitation to the evening’s special event:
COCKTAIL PARTY!!!
Time: 8:00 PM to 12:00 AM
Venue: Falcon Heights (Rooftop Resto-bar)
Please note: Dress code is Formal for Ladies and Gents.
We look forward to see you there
(signed)
Sales Manager
Event sponsor: Heineken
--------------------------------------------------------------
So much for the ban in liquor in this country…
I am too cozy inside my rug to get up and attend the call. I stretch out for my life saver of the hour – my pillow. Pulling it up over my head, I manage to subdue the noise…
Zzzzzzz…….
Beep Beep… Beep Beep…
Now it’s the turn of the notorious alarm clock. Even the pillow over my head fails to drown the shrilling blare. I have to give up.
Pulling myself out of the rug, I somehow manage to shut the darn thing off, but by then the phone starts ringing again.
“Good morning sir… this is your wake up call for 9 AM. We have been trying to wake you up since an hour now. Have a great day!”
Gosh! It is already quarter past 10… Sam and Jose would kill me.
No they won’t kill me, they aren’t that bad. But I am sure they are in the middle of their breakfast at this moment and by the time I reach, the breakfast service would have ended!! Now that is even worse than getting killed by Sam and Jose!
I quickly enter the toilet… Sitting there I start contemplating about ways in which I could at the least grab an omelet from the restaurant. Brushing my teeth and shaving are two tasks which I could do without at this critical situation. That leaves me with just one task – getting dressed!
* * *
This is where I will eclipse my toilet exploits for a while and throw some light on some more important information. If you are wondering, where I am at this moment, I am in a hotel at a country in Middle East with my team for business.
“Business” – That is what we “sales folks” term anything and everything that we do at work. We travel for “business” trips, attend “business” meetings. Even our visas are known as “business” visas and sometimes if we get lucky, we even travel “business” class. So now that I have explained the importance of this word in our lives, I will continue with my story. After a long and hectic conference in the country, today was Friday – the weekend of the Middle East. From tomorrow we begin our series of “business” meetings.
It is very rare for us to get some time for ourselves during our business trip, so Sam and Jose had left no stone unturned to make this day as eventful as possible. That explains the 10:30 AM deadline, when we are to set out of the hotel for the biggest shopping center in the city.
The agenda? Shopping, movies and eating out.
Eating out… phew!! If ever I am travelling to a foreign country with Sam, it is always turns out to be a herculean task to get food at the right time. Sam’s fervor for Indian food always results in us roaming endlessly in unchartered territories. However, the end result always makes it up for the effort put in, as I too am not too fond of cold sandwiches and near-raw meat that are usually served at most places abroad.
* * *
Now back to my toilet saga…
I look down… the shorts that I am wearing seem good enough for the outing that we have planned for today. Looking further down I conclude that the sandals aren’t bad either. All I need to do now is wash, flush and rush – which I finish off in no time. On my way out I quickly grab my green t-shirt, and try to slither it over my head – and this is when my left foot gets caught in the carpet and I come crashing down – BANG!!
“Little do I realize at this time that this is the supernatural power in action, which is trying to give me a not-so subtle hint about something being absolutely not right.”
I rise unperturbed and rush to the restaurant.
* * *
It is already 10:25 AM when I reach the restaurant. The welcome board yells out at me, “Breakfast: 6:30 AM to 10:30 AM”. I mock at the board and rush to the omelet counter.
As I am about to place my order, a voice booms out from over my shoulder, “four egg whites, with salt onion and pepper… and yes, cooked well from both sides”. Hey that’s exactly what I want. I turn back to see Jose smiling at me. “Sir, this order is already set for you at the table…” saying this he points towards Sam, who is waving at me from the corner table.
“Good morning Aadi”, says Sam as I pull up my chair at the table. I could see that Jose had already finished his continental breakfast and was just left with some coffee. Sam cleans his plate by taking the last bite of his French toast.
“You can do a huge favor on us by just managing with this omelet today bro…” Sam tells me. Although he puts it as a request to me but I know Sam means business. “The least you could have done is shaved before coming down for breakfast…” Sam’s mocking continues.
* * *
Till the time I think of giving back a good answer to Sam, let me give you his brief introduction. Sam, the sales head of our group, is the boss of Jose and me. Sales is his life and in every part of his life.
His goal? - To make every member of his team the best sales person in this world.
Since the last one year, ever since he has hired me, Sam has been on his toes to make me presentable as a valuable member of the ‘Sales fraternity’; however some nuts like me are difficult to crack. Although in my defense I can say that I have modified myself a lot – from being the torn-jeans-n-slippers lad from the city, I have now become a so-called high-flying executive who wears suits for most of his day-time activities and shirts with cufflinks for his sun-down engagements. I have even sacrificed my long tresses for this job and my ambition to get a tattoo on my right arm seems like a distant dream now.
However, underneath this strict and no-nonsense shell of Sam lies a caring elder brother who makes sure that even the roughest weathers pass through him before touching his team.
* * *
“Come on Sam… it is the weekend today,” I say. “And moreover, I had shaved last night only…” I add.
“Then you better do something about your hyper-active hormones Aadi, that cause your facial hair to grow back so fast,” Sam strikes back.
I am stubborn, but I am not stupid. I know when to shut up during an argument – especially when there seems to be no chance of the decision going in my favor. I silently set out to finish my breakfast – if you can call that a breakfast.
* * *
“I have called the taxi and it is waiting for us outside the hotel,” Jose declares with a glance at his watch. That is typical Jose… always so particular and so perfect. Now that I have mentioned about this guy and since I have some time till we walk up to the taxi, let me take this opportunity to introduce my counterpart, Jose.
Jose is the perfect example of the good boy that we used to have as class-monitors in our schools.
He always wakes up in time in the morning, finishes all his tasks on time, shaves impeccably every day! And his clothes… his clothes are always formal… yes ALWAYS. Even on a weekend, Jose dresses up in a crisp ironed shirt and a pleated trouser. I sometimes wonder if this guy ever gets into his pajamas, or does he sleep in his business suit?
* * *
As we step out in the smoldering heat of the Middle East summers, Jose spots our taxi and runs towards it. This is when Sam slips something into my pocket and walks off. I dig into my pocket to extract a handful of dry fruits and nuts. I shout out to Sam, “Thanks for that…”
He winks at me and says, “I know that omelet won’t be able to sustain you for more than an hour dude… keep munching till I treat you guys to a grand Indian lunch today!” Popping an almond into my mouth, I follow him to the taxi.
“To the City Center,” Jose directs the driver. Each of us gets busy immediately in directing the AC vent towards our faces. Phew! This heat could roast a duck live on the streets…
“Where are you from?” the driver tries to strike a conversation.
“India,” Jose replies.
“Me from Pakistan,” the driver answers an unasked question.
In no time the conversation between the driver and Jose moves on from countries to Indian movies and Indian film stars. Sam chooses to be the silent spectator, while I wonder about the fact that how could the people from Pakistan who we meet abroad be so friendly with us and vice versa. If only our political leaders could take a few tips from us…
Pondering over this thought, I set out on my mission to hog down the dry-fruits given to me by Sam, before anybody else gets into the mood of munching on a few themselves. In no time we reach our destination and incidentally I too finish my extended breakfast.
* * *
As soon as we enter the mall, we look for directions towards the Carrefour. That’s our global favorite supermarket and on it we rely for our small ration of soft drinks and snacks for our stay during the business trips.
After entering Carrefour, Jose asks me to pick up some cold drink for him and strays away to the books section. Sam and I pick up a cart and begin our shopping expedition. An interesting thing to be pointed out at this moment is that both Sam and I are born shopaholics, and when it comes to this activity we can even put the female of our species to shame. After picking up the regular wafers, biscuits, juices, cold drinks and some chewing gum, we move towards the toys section.
“Why don’t you spend time at a section of your choice, while I pick up some toys for my daughter,” says Sam he adds.
I like the idea as I have pretty much no interest in the toys section.
“Okay then… Catch up with me at the electronics section,” saying this I move on.
* * *
I start looking for directions to the electronics section. That is when I notice a guy staring at my t-shirt with awe. By his attire I can make out that he is a resident of this country. I smile at him and move on…
As I pass by the clothes section, I walk past a mirror. Taking a few steps back I look at myself on the mirror and check if there is something on my t-shirt to attract attention. No… there isn’t.
My gaze travels to the background in the mirror… Oh my God! I see the same guy approaching me from a distance. I start contemplating what might the guy’s intentions be!
“Oh ok… now I understand things a bit clearly,” I explain to myself.
“After ages I have been working out in the gym during this long stay at the hotel. This short stint at the gym might have chiseled out my muscular body from my college body-building days…” I assume. “Moreover, this body-hugging t-shirt fails to be as modest as I am about my well puffed biceps…”
And I have read a lot about homosexuality being openly accepted in countries outside India. With this instance, things start falling into place. However, since my preferences are totally different from this guy’s, this situation calls for an SOS. I take bigger steps towards the electronics section now. On the way I pick up the cold drinks for Jose.
I am sure that the guy must have given up by now. Dropping the cold-drink cans in a cart, I push it towards the sign displaying “Computer Peripherals”.
There is a Sony external hard disk which I have been eyeing since a long while… let me find out if I can afford it with my savings this time.
Little did I know that I had heaved my sigh of relief a little too soon.
“Excuse me Mister!!” a voice booms from behind my back. I turn around and to my horror see the same guy approaching me. This fellow seems to be really desperate to get me.
I ignore his callout and rush towards the toy section. There I see Sam and Jose from a distance and rush to them in no time. Phew… now I am not alone.
“Hey Mister… I think you not hear me! I asking you to stop for so long!” the guy steps in right between me and my colleagues.
* * *
I tell myself, “it is all right Aadi… this man wouldn’t molest you in a public place.” I try all means to pacify myself. I can talk it out and explain to this guy that although I respect his thoughts and inclinations but I wouldn’t be interested in him.
“What’s wrong?” Sam comes out from behind this man. Jose is with him.
“Is he your friend?” the guy asks Sam pointing his finger at me.
“Yes, he is… why do you ask?” Sam retorts.
“Mister… your friend needs to take off his t-shirt RIGHT NOW… else I call the police!” the guy replies.
My jaw drops. I was 100% correct about this guy’s intentions. By now I start believing more in my super powers to judge people – just by looking at a person I can grasp what he is thinking about in no time. However, what bugs me at this situation is how can this guy threaten me so openly?!?
“And may I ask why?” Sam enquires.
“Because in our country alcohol is UNACCEPTABLE… and your friend is wearing a Heineken t-shirt,” he snaps back.
* * *
“What!” Sam, Jose and I gasp in unison.
“Buddy… my friend here is just wearing a Heineken t-shirt… he’s not drinking in public,” Jose tries to play the role of my advocate. Sam nods in agreement.
“I say take off t-shirt or I call police…” the guy adamantly stands by his words.
Finding my friends beside me, I too gather some courage.
“Yes Mister, I am not taking off this t-shirt… do whatever you want to do!” I find my lost voice.
“Oh is it? You are in deep trouble mister… deep trouble!” saying this he walks off.
I feel that I have scared away the idiot. My confidence melts down in no time when Jose whispers to me, “Aadi, I hope we haven’t taken a wrong step by messing around like this in an unknown territory!”
I try to shrug of my fear by saying, “No way Jose… what on earth can that guy do to us?” As soon as I complete my statement, I see the guy returning with two sturdy police men by his sides.
That is enough for my bravery… I look around, spot the nearest sign to the toilet, and flee from the ‘scene of crime’ in a jiffy. I did not see behind me but am sure that close on my heels are Sam and Jose.
* * *
Crashing into the toilet I heave a sigh of relief. Having taken such a twisted and turned path, I am sure that the two overweight policemen and the guy could never have chased me.
I look at my t-shirt in the mirror. Sam and Jose too stare from behind me.
“Take off the darn t-shirt”, Sam says. “You can be in your vest,” he adds.
“If only I would have worn a vest today!” I think out aloud.
“What!” Sam and Jose cry in chorus now. We all are getting better in this skill of exclaiming in accord.
Sam stares at me in fury. I am sure that if the local law doesn’t prosecute me for WEARING the Heineken t-shirt, Sam would certainly hang me for NOT WEARING a vest. In the sales-grooming lessons of Sam, “ALWAYS wear a vest!” was lesson number two – which came a close second after “Shave EVERYDAY!”
In sheer anxiety, I quickly take off my t-shirt. As I shed the piece of cloth from my body, a wee bit of smile curves up in Jose’s face.
“Eureka!” he screams.
I look at Jose in bewilderment. Sam reciprocates my feelings.
“Aadi… I have got an idea!” Jose shouts out in joy. “Just wear your t-shirt like it is now – inside out!” Jose explains.
I look down at my t-shirt. It has turned inside out while I was taking it off – and now it is nothing but a plain gray t-shirt. Without second thoughts I wear my inside out t-shirt and we catch the first taxi back to our hotel.
* * *
The journey back to the hotel is pretty uneventful with none of us uttering a single word throughout the entire drive. I presume that like me the other two are also just praying to their respective gods for saving our asses today.
We enter the hotel and after a brief adieu, head out to our respective rooms. I fish out my room key and swipe it to open the door to my room. All I need right now is a cool shower to loosen me up.
As I step into my room, I spot a white envelop lying at the entrance. I open it to find an invitation card:
--------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Sir,
As an esteemed club-member of our hotel, we would like to extend to you an invitation to the evening’s special event:
COCKTAIL PARTY!!!
Time: 8:00 PM to 12:00 AM
Venue: Falcon Heights (Rooftop Resto-bar)
Please note: Dress code is Formal for Ladies and Gents.
We look forward to see you there
(signed)
Sales Manager
Event sponsor: Heineken
--------------------------------------------------------------
So much for the ban in liquor in this country…
1 comment:
Its a hilarious read, especially the part when the 'presumed gay' approaches the protagonist. :D
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